Mother of All Secrets by Kathleen M. Willett

Author:Kathleen M. Willett [Willett, Kathleen M.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Lake Union Publishing
Published: 2022-08-01T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter Sixteen

Wednesday, October 7

That night, in between feeds, I dreamed of severed arms and legs. That I was tripping over feet and wrists and fingers and elbows while running through the woods. There were rings and bracelets and anklets attached to them.

I wondered if any of the other moms knew about the rings. Maybe Vanessa, who was perhaps checking in more regularly with Isabel’s family. I considered texting them to tell them but decided it would be much easier to talk about it in person; it was too unseemly, too grim to write in a text. I was so relieved that we were meeting today—Vanessa had texted us all late yesterday afternoon, shortly after I’d left her apartment, to arrange an unscheduled meeting. It would be good to see each other, talk about everything, she’d said. It was the first time we’d all be together in person since learning of Isabel’s disappearance last week. Had that been only five days ago? It felt like a year had passed between then and now.

My buzzy anticipation of our meeting, of being able to talk about Isabel, gave me a little more energy than I usually had—I was actually able to do some cleaning and some laundry, and once again put on my fancy leggings and a sweater instead of staying in my sweats all morning. Clara seemed to respond to my energy positively, too, giving me lots of smiles during the day and taking one decent nap in her bassinet.

I walked into the WSWC ten minutes early, the sight of strong working women as always giving me a jolt, a harsh reminder of how foreign their world was to me right now. Productive women getting dressed up, pitching marketing decks, closing deals, probably after eight hours of sleep and a five-mile morning run or a Peloton ride. They might as well have been aliens.

Despite being early, I wasn’t the first to arrive: Selena and Miles were already there. I hadn’t spoken to Selena since our heated conversation a couple of days ago. I was all ready to apologize, but she broke the ice first with a cautious smile.

“Hey, I’m sorry about all that,” she said effusively, not needing to clarify what “that” she was referring to.

“No, no, I’m sorry. You were totally right. I shouldn’t have asked you to . . . I don’t even know what, like, conduct some kind of amateur deep dive into Isabel’s disappearance? I think I’m just looking for an outlet that takes me away from obsessing about Clara a little bit. But that is obviously not the right one. I certainly have no right to be nosing around in her family’s business—and I definitely shouldn’t be, like, recruiting friends to join me! I don’t know what’s wrong with me, to be honest.” Hearing how true my words were made me feel even worse and refreshed my embarrassment.

“I totally get it,” she said. “Look, it’s really upsetting. And I don’t want to seem callous. I’ve been thinking a lot about her, too, obviously.

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